Is cabbage the answer to everything?

What is life? The consequential question many philosophers, scientists, creationists and gods ponder to explain.

So is cabbage the answer to everything? 

The answer is Yes.

hello earthings, ladies and gentlemen, goats and hoes. Look no further.

THIS. this is the answer, to life, the universe and everything

let the cabbage sink in, let it ponder your thoughts, let it consume you. 

repeat after me:

you dont consume cabbage, cabbage consumes you

you dont consume cabbage, cabbage consumes you

once more with pique, anger and desperate devotion:

you dont consume cabbage, cabbage consumes you

Shrek isn't life, cabbage is.